A good best man can be a crucial factor in the smooth running of your wedding day. A well trusted, and organised supporter who takes his role seriously can influence the whole feel of the day – particularly the speeches.

When deciding on a best man, you should never feel pressurised by what friends or family may feel is the best choice – it has to be your choice, and it has to be for all the right reasons. You may find family members “expect” that a brother or close relative would be the obvious choice. You may also find close friends assume the role before you have reached any decision. These situations can be very stressful, so be honest right from the start, and if you feel that there are “expectant” best men in the wings; act swiftly to avoid hurt feelings.

Either way, it may be a simple choice, or you may have to do some serious thinking about the right man for the job.

Many people thing the role of the best man is to come up with a funny and entertaining speech for the wedding breakfast, and to look after the rings. When you consider some of the other factors – it may help you decide

• Supporting the Groom to be throughout the wedding planning process
• Organising a memorable but safe stag event
• Attending rehearsals and taking the role seriously
• Accompanying the groom to the outfitters
• Writing and delivering an original and suitable speech
• Safeguarding the rings on the wedding day
• Leading the ushers and ensuring everyone knows their role
• Remaining calm and confident for the groom on the big day
• Proposing the first toast
• Chaperoning the bridesmaids
• Getting the groom to the church on time

So before making any hasty decisions on your choice of best man, consider some of the following points

• Is he always reliable
• How seriously is he going to take the role of best man
• How likely is he to be punctual
• Is he able to remain calm under pressure
• Is he up to delivering a speech in front of many guests
• Is he likely to let you down
• Will he be courteous and charming to your guests

Once you have made your decision, it is crucial that the role of best man is explained fully – many people do not realise the responsibility and are so taken up with the honour of being asked that they themselves do not consider the implications. So make it clear from the outset, what you expect from your Best Man, and you will be paving the way to a stress free day.

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